My Demon Wife Can't Be This Cute — Episode 1

I want a divorce, Yuki The soup is burnt again, like every night for three years You don't smile, you don't laugh, you don't touch me You just sit there watching me like I'm some kind of assignment I just wanted someone warm, someone who'd laugh at my stupid jokes, someone who'd hold my hand when I come home at midnight smelling like the copier room Just sign it Let me go find something real It's burnt again I've been alive for 9,000 years I've conquered six dimensions I've eaten stars I can't make soup Uh, okay, you're joking That's actually the first joke you've ever... I am not joking, Kenji I'm very bad at jokes I'm also bad at soup and laundry and smiling at the right times Hello, I am Yuki, the Demon Lord of the Sixth Extinction, ruler of 400 demon armies, eater of the star of Andros and your wife- ... for now What the hell are you? I told you, Demon Lord Demon Lords aren't real I've just cracked your ceiling with my presence Your soup is on fire Huh?

What part of this seems fake? Why? Why did you marry me? This is a prophecy 9,000 years old, written before your species learned to walk It says you're going to end me, Kenji You, Kenji Todoroki, age 28, assistant manager at Tanaka Trading, are the only being in all six dimensions who can destroy me That's why I married you You want me to end you?

Yes But first- But- ... could you teach me how to make soup that isn't on fire?